Apologies

Blogspot, it's all I can do to apologise for my absence of late, but I have been obsessed with another. The fickle world of Authonomy caught my eye and I am afraid to say that my head turned. For this I extend my profuse apologies and assure you that I will return to you soon, my true love...

Authonomy

http://www.authonomy.com/books/25125/volcano/

The best thing I have decided to do in a long time...

Thought for the day...

If all you want to be is something better than you are today, are you missing out on enjoying what you have, what you've achieved, who you've become? If you constantly strive to be something different; a similar persona; yet more successful, more loved, more accepted, are you ignoring what you have achieved, ignoring the people who already love you and ignoring the opinions you have created; through life, through love, through hate and through being...well...just being the self you have created?

Just wondered...

Location:Hastings,United Kingdom

Oooooh Betty

Right, Assignment 4. Bizarrely familiar, as it's practically the same as Assignment 1, Assignment 2, and, yes, you've got it...Assignment 3. Yawn. This time I have decided against writing yet another article, and so I shall write letters instead. My first being to 'agony aunt' Betty Brisk in The Sun. It is as follows:

Dear Betty,

I have recently been having what can only be described as 'colourfully raunchy' dreams about a character from a popular television soap. I find myself daydreaming about this person, knowing how much he wants me. When I cast my eyes upon him in the early evening of a Monday, Tuesday, Thursday or Friday, I blush crimson red and mutter 'oh, my darling,' which is making my husband suspicious. I am not sure whether to come clean to my dearest, or keep our dirty little secret between me and the young man from the telly. Please help me, Betty.

Yours,

Karina.

Now, let's see what she has to say about that...

Location:Hastings,United Kingdom

Being famous

I may go into hiding, for I am now famous. My fringe and eyes were broadcast on, as Jeremy Kyle would put it, 'national television.' Nobody else refers to the television as 'national television,' mainly because there is no need. 'Television' would surely suffice?

I am frightened that I will be papped if I step outside the house, as the general public will have a yearning to know what is going on 'behind the fringe'. Which, incidentally, will
be the title of my autobiography.

A still from my national television debut is evidenced below:

Location:Parker Rd,Hastings,United Kingdom

Dutch pie rolls

There is a little bit of me that is Dutch. I have calculated that this part is most probably my left leg, compounded by the fact that my left ankle is aching after the Netherlands extra-time World Cup defeat at the hands of Spain. It could also have been exacerbated by my insistence on leaping in a gazelle-like manner for reasons known only to myself and my equally gazelle-esque colleagues.

On a pie note, I was very much hoping that the Australia thing was the beginning of a pie roll, and that perhaps I would be in line for a stream of publishing luck. This does not appear to be the case, and although I am almost ecstatic that my short story is being published (thus rendering me an actual 'freelance writer), I am also concerned that it is the only story I have ever written that hasn't come from my heart. Maybe the real stuff should be written for cathartic purposes only. A good friend of mine quite rightly pointed out that we all have to compromise, and that perhaps this is mine. Stories that skim the surface of reality; I can live with that. Thank you, my good friend.

I hope that isn't a mosquito that just landed on my face.

Location:Parker Rd,Hastings,United Kingdom

A big fat suburban pie

I haven't been in the land of Blog for a while, mostly due to having nothing to say. Today, however, is different, based on that fact that the Australians bought my pie. Oh yes. One story pie, two pages long, entitled 'Suburbia' is being cooked by editors in preparation for its debut in That's Life Fast Fiction spring edition. Oh yes. That feeling I have right now? That feeling is EXACTLY why I bother with the pies in the first place...


PS. I'm still a little annoyed that I haven't got my greedy hands on an iPhone 4 yet, though.

Location:Parker Rd,Hastings,United Kingdom